Involuntary Midnight (De)Tour of Paris.

Written 19^th April 2012

Last night was horrible! We arrived in Paris okay and after getting a bit lost in the airport (little did we know this was just a taste of what was to come...) we picked up our brand new Renult Sandero. It only had 9km on the speedo. We headed off to the mall to see about buying some replacements for the things that got stolen. We found the mall easy enough and spent the next few hours looking at the different electronics stores and buying a few supplies from the hypermart. (A bit like a really massive Warehouse but with a full supermarket inside too.) Then the trouble began. While we were in the mall it had begun to get dark and it was also pouring with rain. We knew the hotel we wanted to stay at was not far from where we were but were not sure of the direct rout. In hindsight we should have kept driving round and round the roundabout until we got clear on which direction to take and then headed back to the airport to start from there. I'm not sure where we went wrong but we drove for ages and ages through confusing streets that we could not see the markings on properly because of the lights reflecting on the rain soaked streets. There were hundreds of silly lights to stop at that let people cross pedestrian crossings but there were no people about. (our system where the pedestrian presses the button to activate the lights is much better!!!) We were hopping on motorways and getting off then on to others. All the roads seemed to be twisting around each other and changing directions. We became thoroughly lost and disorientated. Eventually we stopped and went into a restaurant to ask for help. I took my map of Paris (which had not been helpful before as the airport area is off the map) and asked the lady where we were on the map. She said we were not on the map still. We had driven from the north east of Paris to the south east of Paris. We were exhausted and asked if there was a hotel nearby. She directed us to one and we made it there successfully. In we went and I asked if the haughty lady on reception spoke English – She didn't. She began speaking rapidly in French at me. I stared at her in incomprehension. Steve had found a price list and it was twice as expensive as the hotel we had planned to stay at. The lady was still speaking at me. Then angrily she said something like “Why do you come to France if you can't even speak French!” or at least that was the understanding I got from the few words I could understand and the tone of words and body language. So we left that hotel and began driving around searching for another one. We had no luck. Finally we found a hotel that was super expensive. I asked the man “Where is a youth hostel” in French. He was not sure but helpfully found us one in the general vicinity and printed us off a map. Away we went on foot. We found it. It was massive. All Full. Great, we went back to the man's hotle and he let us use his internet. We found a hostel nearby that had room (it said – on hostleworld ) so he printed the map for us and we headed off there. He was such a nice helpful man! We made it to the hostel. All the hundreds of rooms were full!!! We were getting desperate. We were so SO tired. We were near the Periferique (the motorway that rings around Paris.) So we thought if we got on it we would be able to find our way to our old skanky Formula 1 Hotel which was starting to look like heaven. We got on there and did find a Formula 1 Hotel that was near our other one but much bigger. I went inside. ALL FULL!!! We were gutted. Why is Paris so popular on a random Wednesday? So and the hotel next door was full too. I asked if our old hotel was full. Yes. Full. He showed me on a map all the ones he knew were full but said he was not sure about the others. We decided our best bet would be to hop back on the Periferique and head south to get on the A6 which had a whole lot of Formula 1s and just keep driving until we found one. It would have been a good plan if not for one thing. A little while along the Periferique it was suddenly closed and we had to get off. There were 2 detour signs to follow and then no more. We would get a bit lost, find a sign leading to the A6, follow it, and end up at an entrance to the Periferique that was blocked off. This happened again and again. We didn't want to abandon our plan as we had no other one. We saw the Arc De Triomph and a bunch of other bits of Paris. Eventually after being rejected from an entrance to the Periferique once again we found ourselves driving up to the feet of the Eiffel Tower – a dark silhouette against the city glow of the night sky. We crossed the bridge next to it and carried on our mission. Not long after we ran out of steam. It was about 2.30am. We tried to sleep huddled together for warmth on the front seats of the car. It was not comfortable. It was not warm. But we managed to get a few winks, enough to recharge and carry on. We had a new plan. We would abandon the illusive A6 and drive back to the Airport and try and find our original Formula 1 Hotel where we were going to stay. If they had no rooms for the night of the 18^th (which was nearly over) we would try and book a room for the 19^th and just get some Mc Dee's and use the WiFi there and wait until we could check in at 12pm. We found our way back to the airport motorway fairly easily. And then we spotted a Formula 1 from the motorway. Yay! And we managed to get off and make it there. It was 5am and we had about 150km on the speedo. We were both shattered. The guy said there was room now but none tomorrow. He said to try next door. I almost cryed. The fellow next door spoke better English and we were able to explain that we wanted to pay for the night that had just been so we could go right to sleep and then stay the night of the 19^th as well. He said - you guessed it - NO ROOM. I said maybe we should go back to the formula 1. Steve explained how we had been driving around all night looking for somewhere to stay. Then the guy picked up the phone and rang Formula 1. He spoke to the other bloke and then said we could stay there until Friday midday. (Which was what we wanted.) We were so happy. We went back to Formula 1 and the guy wrote down the price for 1 night. We were confused. We tried to explain we wanted to pay for 2 nights so we could sleep for longer. He did not understand. He rang the other guy back and said that he had told him to just charge us for 1 night. I think the confusion had been that he thought we wanted to stay Friday and it was full then. So we finally got our room and only had to pay for one night! Yay! We fell into bed and slept until 3pm. Steve woke up feeling crook in the gutts. He's not been well most of the day. We made an excursion back to the mall (which was close by) and got a few more supplies. And now we are back at Formula 1 our favorite hotel (luckily this one is much cleaner and nicer than our other one) trying to sort out our insurance and ready to get a proper nights sleep.